“Experiences” by Absol; February 28, 2023

Hello! I’m a therian. an absol therian, specifically. I’ve adored absol since i was a kid, and a few months ago it just hit me out of nowhere while looking at a gif that that was me. It was so familiar, i am that. It wasn’t a passing thing, I don’t know how to explain it other than that every part of me realized in an instant that i am an absol. It’s so obvious to me now that it feels ridiculous that I never realized it before, but here we are now so i guess it doesn’t matter.

My experiences are strange. I started out thinking it was purely psychological, but now I think it might also be a parallel life. I truly don’t know, the only thing i’m sure of is that it’s more psychological leaning than spiritual. I also kind of pingpong between identifying as an absol therian, and absolkind (otherkind), i think that’s because i have some other alterhuman identities and i happen to also be otherkind, but who fucking knows.

I have roughly one and 1/2 (1/2 being very fuzzy, half memory half noemata lol) memory of being an absol, and a bunch of noemata. I know that I was a wild absol who was caught, and formed a strong bond with my trainer. I don’t know much about domestic life, but i think i was either the only pokemon my owner had, or at least her main companion and always out of my pokeball. I don’t remember her having any other pokemon.

   The memory; sitting on the side of a hill with my trainer (a girl/woman, maybe her early 20s? she had long black hair, and was wearing something blue (overall skirt, dress?? something like that)) in the early hours of the night. we were directly to the left of a tree, and there were fireflies at the base of the hill playing in the long grass. I felt so content.

   I didn’t really. it wasn’t not having a sense of gender, but more like. perceived it differently? I cared, but not a whole lot. and I wasn’t genderless, or agender, or anything like that. Honestly, i’d say that my gender was literally gender neutral. not nonbinary, straight up i think if you’d asked me my gender i would have said ‘i am gender neutral’. I think that was fairly typical for absols, we didn’t really bother; although i think i would have still been considered nonbinary by absol standards, i know my packmates were more ‘gender neutral with a sprinkle of male or female’

sometimes i feel more like a mega absol, sometimes i don’t. I assume it’s due mega evolutions being temporary. The pokedex states that absols don’t like mega evolving due to disliking fighting & violence, but i remember just feeling strong and determined. almost regal. nothing upsetting.

   also on the topic of canon divergences, when mega evolved i could fly. the wings were capable of flight, unlike official canon.

my entire experience being an absol is strange. It doesn’t really feel like i’m a fictional species. I feel like i should be in this world, like i’m just another type of canine. but I know i’m not.

   It’s also very isolating. I don’t go into fandom spaces because it’d be be incredibly awkward, and i’m scared of seeking out others with Pokémon alterhuman identities due to the amount of kin-means-relate-to folks i’ve met in the past. I want to find others, but basically i’m a fucking coward <3